No one understood Forrest Gump.

Most people thought they were smarter. Better. At everything. Few got to know him personally and how much he had to offer.

But the more I watch that movie, the more I realize that Forrest Gump looks a lot like Jesus. The unconditional love...the willingness to sacrifice and do what was necessary in a particular time and place...to speak up when it would've been easier to be quiet.

And when we realize that we do need someone--someone to stand by us no matter what--someone to forgive the mistakes we've made--someone to accept us--we want a Forrest Gump. We want Jesus.

The character of Jenny is a wild one. I can't say that I ever came close to all those antics, but I have made mistakes, been selfish, attempted to control my destiny. The world will lead us right to the ledge and almost dare us to jump off. The world is in total opposition to what God wants...we have to ask if we're truly going to follow the One who will lead us to hope and peace or if we're going to let the world dictate everything we do and lead us to more vices than I care to list.

Right now it's funny to think that about 30 years ago, I went on the famous "Cover Trip" to Washington, DC. Kristen went five years ago; Nick is on his way now. Mom asked me yesterday what I remembered from the trip, and although my memory has faded, I still remember the tours, monuments, and museums. I remember having homework at night and being scared to death about a debate we had with other touring students. Most of all, I remember that I wanted to be a politician "when I grew up."

Before anyone laughs about that, just remember what politicians are voted into office to do--to change the world.

It reminds me of the movie Evan Almighty. Evan Baxter wanted to change the world, too. He did...once he listened to God.

I wonder how I will change my little corner of the world tomorrow?

k.

I have been blessed this week with an amazing number of texts, calls, cards, emails, and FB messages...I have been as overwhelmed today with support as I was with grief a few days ago. I know that it's really easy to become busy just living your own life, but what a blessing to others you can be by just sending a card, a message, a text.

Words are so powerful.

For those who have used words, both verbal and written, to hurt my family...I have forgiven and have prayed for you today. For those who have used words to heal my raw soul, I thank you.

k.

To expound on the previous blog...You know, I've realized that for a good portion of my life (maybe all of it), God really hasn't asked me to do anything hard. No huge sacrifices being asked of me, no real issues beyond the typical range of emotion. A loving spouse, great kids, jobs to put food on the table...

Or maybe He has asked me to sacrifice, and I just didn't realize it.

Or mabye He has asked me to sacrifice, and I just ignored it.

It's easy to say "God is in control" or "Let go and let God," but it is much more difficult to actually live out...especially for a recovering control freak like me.

k.

Our lives have totally changed.

I have been slow to process it all, but know this: God is in control. It has taken me 4 months to feel it, believe it...even though I've said it for years and years.

k.